Resolve Differences
Resolve Differences
Resolving conflict doesn’t come easily to too many people. Most of us want harmonious relationships and smooth interpersonal interactions. However, we know that disagreements and conflicts are ffds1 part of any dynamic organization. They arise because people care about their jobs and want to produce good results. Conflict is not always negative, however. Sometimes it should be encouraged when discussion and debate can generate creative, innovative approaches to issues or decisions. Conflict is beneficial when the focus is on finding the best solution. However, conflict is unproductive when it fails to produce mutually satisfying solutions or when it becomes personal in nature.
When you are involved in a conflict yourself, consider these ideas:
· Depersonalize the conflict. Catch yourself when you begin to fall into the trap of believing that the other person is deliberately trying to make a situation difficult.
· At the beginning of resolving differences or conflict, clearly sate your desire to find a solution that will work for all involved.
· Build on areas of agreement before you address areas of difference.
· Remember to listen first and talk second. Ask open-ended questions to draw others out and to encourage them to talk about the conflict.
· Try to arrive at a common goal around which everyone involved can focus, and agree to work through areas of disagreement. In other words, don’t agree to outcome that you will not support. Surface reservations that you have and talk with the other person until you can agree on a course of action.
· Dig for understanding without implying criticism.
· Focus on common ground issues and interests of both sides. Find a “win” for all affected parties and avoid entrenched positions.
· Identify specific behaviors in concrete terms and explain the tangible outcomes they have, so that the other person can more easily appreciate the nature of the difficulty.
· Rely on facts instead of judgments or inferences to help you avoid giving feedback that becomes personal.
· Have a goal in mind, a purpose for the meeting or discussion.
Remember to put it in once sentence that attacks the problem, not the person. Secondary issues can divert or confuse matters. However, when you concentrate on accomplishing tasks and the required behaviors for getting the job done, you won’t be distracted. Ask yourself, “What is my goal in saying this?” Focus your
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